Ease Wellbeing

Ease talking therapies logo

Struggling with identity

At the centre of and throughout our being, is our sense of identity.

Some aspects of our identity are given to us while others are created through our actions and experiences as we go through life.

Identity has many layers starting with how we see ourselves as an individual and continuing through to the sense of being connected to others by shared history, beliefs, values and goals.

Identity can be a source of comfort, strength and confidence but can also leave us with a sense of shame, isolation or confusion.

Identity as given

Where we are born, who our parents are and the culture or society we grow up in, will have a huge influence on our sense of identity.

We come in to contact with a set of values beliefs and expectations that will form part of who we are for life. They come first from our care givers.

As we get older; peers, teachers, and the society we grow up in, will add complexity to our identity.

Identity created

Our identity is fixed in a few ways, but many aspects of our identity we create, recreate and are constantly adjusting.

As we experience the world, we have the capacity to form our own conclusions about who we are and want to be.

Feeling adrift

We may lose our sense of identity in times of trouble, in times of loss, of separation and in times of distress and difficulty. 

Who am I if I am separated from colleagues or friends or family?

Conflict

Whatever forms your identity, there will be layers of beliefs, values and attitudes that combine to make you, you.

One of the leading reasons for people to seek support is conflict between who someone is and who they want to be or who they feel they are expected to be.

How we help

Talking therapy enables you to look at how you see your identity. What aspects form who you are and what impact do they have on your life?  It is an opportunity to consider how it came to be a part of your identity. Is it inherited or as a direct result of your experience? What is meaningful and what is meaningless?  

These are central to the task of being able to negotiate with ourselves how we view ourselves and are seen and regarded, how we wish to be seen and regarded and to take into account what we would be able to give up about how we are.

This offers the possibility to consider, reconsidering aspects of our identity that seem to give us a greater sense of meaning and purpose in life.

Being kind to myself

“It has been helpful to gain new perspectives in my thinking process and also to become more boundaried in terms of helping and being kind to myself. It has been useful to talk openly and has helped me to accept my problems and try to deal with them.”

EASE Client